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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27572251">aisle 9</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/bytheinco_nstantmoon/pseuds/bytheinco_nstantmoon'>bytheinco_nstantmoon</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>we bring the rain [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Black Friday - Team StarKid, Julie and The Phantoms (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Family Drama, Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Luke Foster Rights, Luke Patterson Needs a Hug (Julie and The Phantoms), Mental Health Issues, Misunderstandings, Panic Attacks, Self-Esteem Issues, Thanks, The Fosters Are A Mess, but he does get one!!, but like. unconventional, can we make that a tag please, if only i knew how to write damn, it'd be OVER for y'all, luke is going Through It okay, songwriting as a metaphor for identity, uh let's see what shit i pulled this time, yeah anyway</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 20:53:29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,113</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27572251</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/bytheinco_nstantmoon/pseuds/bytheinco_nstantmoon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Lex had always talked about New York, about escaping the trailer and the dead end jobs and the bottles that were always scattered around, but Luke had never realised she was talking about escaping <i>him,</i> too.</p><p>Luke had kept up with his sister's class schedule since he was 13.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Luke Patterson &amp; Lex Foster</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>we bring the rain [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2015422</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>36</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>aisle 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>i legit ONLY wrote this to peer pressure sofi into writing the theatre class au that's it im sorry</p><p>also they live in cali so. instead of lex wanting to go to cali it's new york. because u know broadway and stuff</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Luke had kept up with Lex’s class schedule since he was 13. She got her first job that year- at Marty’s Grocery, the only place that would hire at 14- and it was December before he realised she’d been skipping for shifts.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They hadn’t really fought before that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They’d screamed at each other in the middle of aisle 9, because she was skipping to work and he was skipping to catch her skipping to work, and if they need the money so badly, why didn’t she ask him to get a job, and nobody hired at 13, he was so </span>
  <em>
    <span>stupid, </span>
  </em>
  <span>and he wouldn’t be able to keep a job anyway, he couldn’t even pay attention long enough to stay in school, and-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They fought now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke wasn’t really sure if they’d ever recovered from that first one, actually, because every damn time it was the same reel, the same words, the same insults getting thrown back and forth and back and forth and getting used again and again and again to no goddamn end. (Maybe it was because they spent too much time fighting. Maybe it was because they only knew the weaknesses they’d found back in aisle 9, and they didn’t really know each other at all. Maybe they were dooming themselves. Catch-22.)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But anyway; he knew her class schedule. Which meant he knew, unfortunately, when she failed her arts credit in the tenth grade, and now, two years later, the school was forcing her to make it up with the seventh period theatre class. He knew mostly because Reggie was in the class too, and apparently Lex was hella good at it. She wanted to be an actress, Reggie said. She wanted to be on Broadway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke wished he didn’t know that. He wanted to want to, because he wanted to want to know his sister, because Jesus Christ, Lex deserved better, but he didn’t want to know, because it kept get caught at the tip of his tongue during fights. Because he kept getting caught up on it, and tumbling nearly to the edge, and biting it back at just the last second. Because Lex hated his dreams, hated what he wanted for himself, and when he was angry, he wanted to hate hers back. He wanted to begrudge her the stage.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he couldn’t, because </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Lex deserved better.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wasn’t surprised when Reggie told him about the play. So the class had to write and perform something. That made sense. What didn’t make sense, it turned out, was anything </span>
  <em>
    <span>about </span>
  </em>
  <span>the play- Lex had evidently elected herself leader of the class, and she was pioneering a goddamn disaster for that stage. Something about naked Russians? Or nuking Russians, possibly, he wasn’t sure- Reggie had been talking very quickly. It was about consumerism, or religion, or like, a cult? It was exactly what he’d expect from her, if he had ever been allowed to expect positive things.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When she asked him, it was a Friday. 10 pm. He had forgotten to make dinner, because he’d been over at Alex’s to rehearse some new songs, and- well. They fought nowadays. The kitchen was silent aside from Hannah’s almost-silent humming as she sat working on a picture. Lex was messing around in a notebook, scribbling something, when she gasped aloud. “Hannah!” Luke glanced over his shoulder to see her sitting straight up in her seat, grinning. He hadn’t seen Lex grin like that in a long, long time. “Hannah, holy shit, what if it was a </span>
  <em>
    <span>musical?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Hannah exchanged her pink crayon for a yellow one. “Solo,” she said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sure, you can have a solo. Yes. Oh my God, the Christmas movie! I was wondering how to fit that in! It can have its own musical number, and I can get that weird twinky guy to choreograph-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nick or Ethan?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nick. Ethan isn’t a twink, Hannah, be nice.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes he is,” Hannah mumbled, but kept scribbling with her crayon instead of continuing the conversation.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lex was bouncing in her seat. “Oh, this is gonna be so good. I just- oh, I’m a moron, Luke!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He startled, not expecting to hear his name. “Huh?” he asked, half jerking around. She was grinning at him brightly- when was the last time she grinned at him like that? God, why did this feel so strange? Why wasn’t he grinning back, you idiot, you look like an asshole-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Music!” Lex exclaimed. “You write music! Help me write the music for my play!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke blinked. “You want me to… help you write songs?” he repeated, turning the words over in his head. Lex- </span>
  <em>
    <span>Lex,</span>
  </em>
  <span> the same sister who’d screamed at him not two hours ago for wasting time on the band, for not caring enough to help out his family, who he’d called selfish and stuck up and screamed that </span>
  <em>
    <span>it made him happy, why did she fucking hate him for being happy- </span>
  </em>
  <span>that Lex wanted him to help her write songs?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah. I mean, unless you don’t-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, I do. I’ll do it. Of course I’ll do it,” he said, so quickly his words went flipping and tumbling over each other in the rush. “Just- yeah, just hit me up this weekend, I’ll get some ideas together.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Great!” Lex exclaimed. She was still beaming. “This’ll be fun.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Luke replied, half smiling back, not really believing it at all. He wouldn’t skip out on helping her, but they fought nowadays, and there was no goddamn way they’d make it through a whole </span>
  <em>
    <span>musical </span>
  </em>
  <span>without her making some snide remark about the band, or </span>
  <em>
    <span>so this is why you never help out at home? </span>
  </em>
  <span>or something. He didn’t want to fight, but in truth, they’d never left aisle 9.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Except he was wrong.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lex had approached him the next day, her notebook held out like a treaty, and they’d spent hours and hours sitting on his bed, figuring out melodies and harmonies and rhythms, putting together lyrics and fixing the lyrics because Lex didn’t know how to rhyme, and they’d laughed and he’d taught her a few chords on the guitar, and it was </span>
  <em>
    <span>good.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>On Sunday, they fought about who was taking Hannah to the doctor- but could they even take her, because sure, she had a fever, but did they even have the money, since Luke spent all his time with the band and couldn’t be bothered to get a fucking job, and Luke almost said it this time, almost yelled </span>
  <em>
    <span>how do you expect to be a fucking actress when you can’t even act like a sister? </span>
  </em>
  <span>but it wasn’t fair. So he bit it back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He expected her to tear up the songs after that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn’t, apparently, because on Tuesday, he came home right after school. Band practice was cancelled because Reggie had a family emergency- something about a cousin? Luke wasn’t really sure- and he was already in the trailer, about to head for their shared bedroom (and maybe he should sleep at Alex’s again tonight, because Lex was probably still mad, and it was hard to sleep four feet away when he could taste the bitter words she was holding back at four in the morning) when it caught his ear. A faint gasping sound, a hitching sigh- and then a hushed murmur. He edged closer to the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, hey, it’s okay, Lexi,” he heard Ethan saying, and his spine bristled. God, of course </span>
  <em>
    <span>Ethan </span>
  </em>
  <span>was here. When wasn’t he?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>(And that wasn’t fair, and he knew that, and he knew he’d lose his goddamn mind if they didn’t have Ethan around, but it tasted acidic all the same, because he’d come home to find Ethan braiding Hannah’s hair the other night, and now that’s all he can see. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Luke </span>
  </em>
  <span>is supposed to braid Hannah’s hair. Luke has </span>
  <em>
    <span>always </span>
  </em>
  <span>braided Hannah’s hair.)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>(But Luke wasn’t home.)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>(Sometimes, he thought Lex might be sort of right, but he’d die before he ever admitted it.)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I just… I can’t do this, I really can’t- I can’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>do </span>
  </em>
  <span>this anymore, E-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ethan shushed her. “Hey, look at me. Look at me, okay?” There was a moment of silence. Something dark and sick and burning was brewing at the pit of Luke’s stomach. “It’s gonna be okay. Just breathe, Lexi. New York, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a wet little laugh. “Right. New York.” There was a pause, and then, “Luke fucking hates planes,” and his stomach dropped. He didn’t like hearing his name like that, all caught up in tears. It made something sick swell up in his throat. “He hates them, E, he fucking-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, hey, hey- don’t worry about Luke, babe. Luke’s gonna be okay. You’re gonna be okay. I mean, what you were singing earlier-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s so good. Fuck.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah. He’s gonna be okay, babe.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke crept out of the trailer before he could hear any more, his ears buzzing and his head spinning and his feet unsteady beneath him. </span>
  <em>
    <span>He’s gonna be okay. He fucking hates planes. </span>
  </em>
  <span>He did, he hated the entire idea, he hated the thought of going up in the air and letting his life hang in the balance, but he’d ride a plane for them. They knew that, right? They knew he wanted to get out of here, didn’t they? Lex had always talked about New York, about escaping the trailer and the dead end jobs and the bottles that were always scattered around, but Luke had never realised she was talking about escaping </span>
  <em>
    <span>him, </span>
  </em>
  <span>too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He went home early that night, and skipped band practice the next day, and then the next, and the next, and avoided the guys at school, because he couldn’t afford an interrogation. He made dinner every night and he cleaned up the bottles and when Mom got home while Lex was putting Hannah to bed, he stood firmly outside the door and kept her on the other side of the threshold. He got a bruise to the eye for his troubles, but Hannah got a good night’s sleep, and that was what mattered. If he could take a few more bruises, maybe he could earn a plane ticket. If he could just keep getting home early, keep avoiding the guys, keep biting his tongue until it bled to keep from humming, maybe he could make it to New York. Maybe.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’d known Lex’s school schedule since he was 13. He hadn’t realised she knew his, too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What the hell are you doing here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His head jerked up. “Hey, you’re supposed to be in theatre-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, and you’re supposed to be in history,” she snapped. She was scowling at him, her whole face twisted up, like he’d done something wrong. As if she hadn’t been skipping school to work since she was 14. “What the hell are you doing here?” she repeated, her voice a little more testy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke gestured around. “Gee, Lex, I don’t know,” he said sarcastically. “Working, maybe? Do you think I wear this nametag for fun?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, okay, time to clock out, then.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Actually, I’m not off till four- ow!” Lex just smacked his shoulder again. “Ow! What the fuck, Lex-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>leaving,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>she ground out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke bit his tongue to keep from humming Get Lost and said, “Owen, I’ve got to go. Family emergency,” because maybe if he didn’t glare back, he could earn a ticket to New York. Owen let him go with a sigh and a roll of the eyes. His glare wasn’t nearly as threatening as Lex’s, though, so Luke just rolled his eyes back and followed his sister as she stalked out the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had Ethan’s keys, apparently. They rode in silence for almost ten minutes, just going in circles, before she broke it. “So?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke kept staring out the window. “So </span>
  <em>
    <span>what, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Lex?” he asked. He meant for it to be sharper than it was, but instead it was just tired and dull and grey. Like the bags under his eyes and fading bruises around his wrist and the mornings that came stretching ahead of him. Maybe, maybe, if he could just make it through the grey, he could get to New York. Maybe he could earn it, if he held back enough tears.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She took a turn sharply enough to jolt him. “So? Why were you at Marty’s instead of school?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I was working.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I could fucking see that, Luke,” she snapped. “But you were </span>
  <em>
    <span>supposed </span>
  </em>
  <span>to be working on history. Not ringing up groceries.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His shoulders stiffened slightly. “Oh, what, so </span>
  <em>
    <span>you’re </span>
  </em>
  <span>allowed to skip school for work, but when </span>
  <em>
    <span>I-”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re not me, Luke!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I know! But just because I’m not-” his voice cracked, failing him, and the tension in his shoulders snapped, and he went shrinking down in his seat, crumbling all at once. Lex stopped the car. Luke’s breath hitched. “What are you-” he looked between her and the window wildly, and the empty woods and the dirt road and the nothing, the nothing, and- “I’m sorry,” he said, his voice breaking again. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I just thought we could use the money, I didn’t mean to-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Luke,” Lex said, but he shook his head desperately.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t mean to upset you, I swear, I thought you’d be happy, please don’t leave me here, please don’t leave me, I don’t wanna be alone-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Luke!” she said again, louder, and then she was clambering out of the car. Shit. Shit, shit. She pulled open his door and Luke let out a wounded noise, curling in on himself. “Luke, hey, Luke, look at me-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice breaking again. “I’m so sorry, I swear I am, just don’t-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She grabbed his shoulders. “Luke!” He stuttered off, staring at her with wide eyes. “Luke,” she said again, and smoothed his hair off his forehead. “Hey. There he is. There’s my Lukey.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No one calls me that,” he whispered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lex shushed him. “I’m your sister. I can call you whatever I want, Lukey,” she said, and it should have been annoying, but instead his eyes just welled up with tears. “Wait, no, I’ll call you Luke, don’t cry-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you,” he interrupted. “I love you. Please don’t leave me-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She reached over to unbuckle him. “Hey. Hey, please come here, Luke. Come here. Let me hug you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He didn’t want to crawl out of the car, because they were in the middle of nowhere and it was so empty and quiet and cold and he’d given his jacket to Hannah this morning because hers was wearing through. But Lex was asking him, and maybe if he didn’t argue, maybe if he was good, he could earn a plane ticket. Maybe if he let her leave him here, she wouldn’t want to escape him anymore. Maybe.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She dragged him into her arms as soon as his feet were on the ground. “There. See? I’ve got you,” she said, rubbing his back gently. “I love you too, Luke. You’re my little brother. You’ll always be my little brother.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“‘M taller than you,” he mumbled, because he couldn’t help it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not in spirit.” She tightened her grip. “You gonna tell me the truth now, kid?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He stiffened. “I did. I did, I swear, I-”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Luke.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>She cut him off firmly, but there was a softness there, a gentleness to her voice that he hadn’t heard since they found themselves in aisle 9. "Hey. Just breathe. I trust you."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>How long had he been crying?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I trust you,” she said again. “Now tell me why you weren’t at school.” He went to open his mouth, but she kept talking. “And then tell me,” and oh shit, her voice was hardening, “Tell me why you haven’t spoken to Reggie in weeks, and why your guitar is </span>
  <em>
    <span>dusty, </span>
  </em>
  <span>and why- God, Luke, what happened? Did Mom do something?” She pulled back to look him in the eyes, her face pinched tight. “You can tell me if she did something. I promise.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke swallowed hard. “She’s just mad,” he said softly. He couldn’t muster up much of a voice. “She doesn’t like having me around, you know that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well,” Lex said, looking torn. She smoothed his hair back again, her brows twisting more. “Well, </span>
  <em>
    <span>I </span>
  </em>
  <span>like having you around.” Luke snorted. “Shush.” Her hand lingered on his temple, gentler of a touch than he’d had in weeks. “But I haven’t really seen you at all recently.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke frowned. “I’ve been home all the time,” he protested weakly. “I’m always around.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not really.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh.” He wracked his brain. “I mean, I’m 17, I can drop out-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s not what I mean!” Luke flinched back before he could help it. Lex pressed her lips together tightly, remorse flashing over her face. “I’m sorry, Lukey,” she said quieter. “I just… I’m worried about you. You’re not okay, kid.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He mustered up a smile. “I’m fine.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn’t believe him. Her face just drew tighter. “I’m not a moron.” Her fingers trailed around the edge of the yellowed bruise on his eye. “You didn’t get this from that kid at school, did you?” she murmured.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke swallowed. “She was just mad,” he replied, his voice trembling. “You know how she gets.” He tried to keep his smile up, but he knew it was quavering. “It’s okay, Lex, I promise-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not okay!” Her grip tightened, almost instinctively, and Luke knew he was crying, because </span>
  <em>
    <span>God, </span>
  </em>
  <span>when had Lex last reached out to him on </span>
  <em>
    <span>instinct? </span>
  </em>
  <span>When had he ever been someone she reached out to if she didn’t need something in return? When had she ever been able to depend on him to be there? “It’s not okay, Luke, it’s fucking not. You </span>
  <em>
    <span>tell </span>
  </em>
  <span>me if she ever hurts you again, okay? You</span>
  <em>
    <span> tell </span>
  </em>
  <span>me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hannah needed to sleep,” he protested weakly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hannah would rather you be safe.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I would rather Hannah get sleep.” Lex’s hands stiffened, and he flinched, half-twisting away, because she’s tense and he shouldn’t have said that and her hand were stiffening and-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And she was pulling him back into a hug. “Hey.” She squeezed him. “Hey. I’m not gonna hurt you. I promise. I promise.” She rubbed him back again. His muscles relaxed under her touch. He couldn’t help it. “I </span>
  <em>
    <span>love </span>
  </em>
  <span>you, Luke. I just… I’m worried, okay? What’s going on?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He shook his head. “I can’t-” he choked on his own words. “I’m sorry, Lexi, I can’t- I don’t even know, I just wanna- I just- don’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>leave </span>
  </em>
  <span>me, I promise I’ll be better, I promise, I won’t sing, I won’t, I’ll be good, just </span>
  <em>
    <span>don’t leave me-”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Lex’s arms cinched around him. “What are you on about?” she asked, sounding bewildered. “Luke, you don’t- what?” She pulled back enough to catch his eyes. “You don’t…” she trailed off, frowning. “I don’t want you to </span>
  <em>
    <span>be </span>
  </em>
  <span>better,” she said. “I want you to </span>
  <em>
    <span>get </span>
  </em>
  <span>better. I want you to sleep more, and start smiling again, and not skip school, and- I just want my little brother back. I want my Luke back. I wanna see him looking happy again.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He bit back another sob. “I wanna go </span>
  <em>
    <span>with </span>
  </em>
  <span>you,” he admitted, his voice fragile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lex blinked. “What?” She smoothed back his hair again, her other hand gripping his shoulder tightly. “Go with me where, kiddo?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“New York.” His voice was small, but he couldn’t get it to raise, not when it was fraying like an old, rotten rope, stretched and ready to snap. “I know- I know I’m difficult, and I don’t help enough, and I need to get my shit together, but I’m trying, Lex, I’m trying, I just wanna be able to go with you, I just wanna-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Luke!” She was gripping both his shoulders now, tight enough to drag him back down. “Luke, what are you- of course you’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>coming, </span>
  </em>
  <span>you’re my brother-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I thought you were mad,” he said, maybe a bit dumbly. “Thought… wait, what did I do right?” He could do it again. He could make her happy, he could fix this, he could be </span>
  <em>
    <span>worth it-</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>But Lex said, “Excuse me?” and his face fell. “No, no, I- Luke, what are you trying to do?” She looked so confused. He- fuck, he hadn’t done enough- “Luke, please, just talk to me,” she pleaded. “Just… just talk to me. Just explain this to me, okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke blinked, swallowing hard. Paused for a moment before he nodded, because he didn’t even know how to begin, but Lex was asking, and she deserved an answer. She deserved what she asked for. Something easy for once in their miserable lives. “Okay,” he said softly. “I- okay. Uh.” He bit his lip, trying to figure out how to start. “I heard- I heard you talking to Ethan,” he said carefully. “And you said that I… you said </span>
  <em>
    <span>Luke hates planes, </span>
  </em>
  <span>and I do hate planes, but Ethan said I’d be okay, and I </span>
  <em>
    <span>won’t, </span>
  </em>
  <span>I won’t be okay, I need you around, I need you with me, Lex, and I- I need to do better, I know, I need to get it right, but I’m trying, I swear, and I’ll do it. I’ll do anything. Just give me some time, I’ll figure it out, but you can’t leave me, you can’t, please just let me try-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lex clapped a hand over his mouth. There was something harsh in her eyes, something that burned all the way through his tears, that struck against the back of his skull, angry and vibrant and steely. “For the love of God, Luke,” she said, and he mouthed an apology against her palm. She shook her head. “Luke-” she said again, but it was more like a choke. “Luke, my </span>
  <em>
    <span>God,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>and she dragged him into another hug. “You’re such an idiot, Lucas. God. I’m not going to- of course you’re coming. You were always coming, just as long as you were willing to. We </span>
  <em>
    <span>want </span>
  </em>
  <span>you to come. You’re family, you moron, you’re my brother-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke’s head was spinning. “Wait- wait, I-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lex shushed him. “You’re good. You’re good, Luke.” She was crying too, he noticed distantly, but she rubbed at his cheeks instead of her own, and something about that made his heart soften. “You’re so good.” He crumpled into her arms. It was safe, even in the middle of nowhere, even shaking and sobbing and choking in Lex’s arms, because it was Lex, and he didn’t need to earn anything. They </span>
  <em>
    <span>wanted </span>
  </em>
  <span>him. God, they wanted him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you,” he managed, his voice rough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you too. I’ve got you, Luke. Just breathe for me, okay? Just breathe.” She rubbed his back, holding him tight, holding him like she didn’t want to let go. Holding him like he was precious. Like he mattered. Like she’d choose to hold him, even if she didn’t have to, and maybe he was overthinking it all, but it made it so much easier to breathe when he pretended it was true. “I </span>
  <em>
    <span>love </span>
  </em>
  <span>you,” Lex said again, more fiercely.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke curled further into her shoulder. “Sorry. Sorry I’m a mess, Lexi, I really don’t mean to be, I just wanna-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know,” she said, cutting him off. “Please don’t apologise. Just… just breathe.” She pulled him closer. “Will you help me finish my songs tomorrow?” she asked after a moment. “Just… just write a song with me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He hadn’t written a song in weeks, and he was fucking scared, because his guitar was dusty and his band probably hated him and maybe he didn’t remember how to write music at all, but he could do it for Lex. Not for a plane ticket, not for New York, but for her, for his sister- yeah, he could write a song. He could write a billion songs, if that was what Lex wanted.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course. Yeah. Yeah, of course.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thank God,” she breathed. “And talk to Reggie? Please? He’s driving me </span>
  <em>
    <span>insane.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He laughed as well as he could when his whole body was shuddering. “I will,” he promised. “I’ll talk to him tomorrow. Is it okay if I’m home late?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lex hummed, running a hand through his hair. He melted against her shoulder at the gentle feeling. “If it’ll make you smile, stay at his house all night. Just bring me my Luke back. Okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay,” he whispered. His voice was failing him again. “I love you, Lexi.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She kissed his head. “I love you too.” And somehow, maybe, he believed it; and somehow, maybe, for the first time in years, standing in the middle of nowhere, Luke felt like they’d stepped out of aisle 9.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>there ya go!! that is. yep that's a whole thing. yeah!! luke foster rights baby</p></blockquote></div></div>
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